when yer skin looks like the salmon they are serving at catering

Things I’ll never learn. Sitting poolside having desert facials with out sunscreen and forgetting to say you are sorry for farting while in catering.
Well Omaha hope you didn’t miss us. The people on the Uproar tour did. That’s because we are awesome. Not as cool as the Dude Bros but they missed us. We made it just in time to Kansas City for a pretty stellar show but the real fun came the next day when we made it to St. Louis. Always a great time there. If we aren’t making asses out of ourselves at the Silver Ballroom (sure I wouldn’t mind free drinks for life) we have no problem doing it on stage at the Verizon Wireless (sure I’d like a free phone and a free plan for the plug). Remember this nightmare? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GDuAhiNYhtk
I sure do! I had a blast. Also plugged Silver Ballroom at the end of the song. 1…2..3. Three plugs for the Silver Ballroom(now 4). The 3rd one is in the video.
Speaking of rambling we came up with another way to kill the boredom. Be on the Youtube (sure I’ll take free video for life, wait…) lookout for Seether PJ’s and Glitter Cocks. But in the meantime back to Bob’s Bunk Blog-Now with Pictures! Hopefully these will keep you busy while I make room in my schedule of starting a mutiny to edit video. Yep I’m the next Martin Scorsese. Have you ever seen the Last Waltz? It’s amazing! The hoser’s over in Finger 11 showed it to me years ago after singing karaoke on their bus.
Where’s Seether right now? Well go to Google Maps (sure I’ll have some free shares of your stock), type in Maryland Heights, then get directions to Calgary from there. We are somewhere along that route and would you take a look at that mileage!
I gotta go clean out my arteries. I just hand a grilled cheese hamburger. I literally felt like I was falling asleep. Thanks Lucky’s 13 (I never plugged so many things in one blog, but sure I’ll take the free meals). And if you know where that is at, that’s where we are on the map to Calgary.
Too late we’re gone! We are on our way to a city that rhymes with fun.

the stunning conclusion of a terrible idea

The answer is was looking for was ‘see you laters.’ Because you can see the corn later in your poop. Seether what I did? I just did that twice.
Lost? Me too. Confused? Take a number. So who saw the guys in Montreal the other night? Yeah nobody did. Seether decided not to play as Seether. We did a special show as Seiber at Foufounes Electriques. It was pretty amazing. So was that bartender. It’s a pretty frenchy name for a pretty frenchy bar. But some times new things need to break out in weird clubs. It was guest list only that night. And nobody was on it.
At this point it’s all business and money for these guys. They got gigs playing at weddings and Quinceañeras. Speaking of weddings, sorry Omaha we will not be there this weekend. Seiber is playing a gig at their friends wedding.
Speaking of weekends if yer at the show in Chicago and read this before you go to the show break out your cell phones and record ‘tonight.’ We are filming a video of it and will be using fan videos as well. Were do you send the videos to? Beats me but I bet if you do some research you’ll find it somewhere. I’d start at seether.com. Hopefully this gets posted ‘tonight’. Wait, what, did I just do it again. Oopsies.
Speaking of oopsies I just farted more than I could chew. WAIT!! That sounds completely wrong. Gotta go dinner is making my stomach upset. Bob-blob tour-blog.

the great escape and the wiener is...

Nothing quite makes my big irish head bigger than a shout out on the radio. Which reminded me that I haven’t done these in awhile.
So let’s recap what’s been going on since my mom wrote the last one.
Nothing!! Well that’s not necessarily true but there’s only so many times I can write about how awesome airports are and getting zapped in the body scanners. What’s that lump?
I’ve also found the time to eat catering everyday. Trying to get my body to catch up with my huge head. We are on the Uproar Tour now with a bunch of bands. So in between naming different types of food, like corn and nuts, we have a thing we do, but mostly me, everyday. I prank call everyone on the tour through the radio. Same time every day and say the same thing. It’s fun. But shh don’t tell any of them.
Anyways how about this, I can’t really do this but let’s give it a shot. Somewhere in this bloggy blog I have the name for one of the food items we’ve named. The first person to guess it correctly, or maybe the funniest, will get 1 ticket to a show in the worst seat possible. Sounds like a great deal right?
So what’s the band been up to? Well a lot of kissing babies, shaking hands, and losing to me in video games. Except for Mortal Kombat. Also did this thing at the Guitar Center in W. Hollywood that’s gonna be on Direct TV. That should be pretty cool. Speaking of pretty cool the guys also did something extra special when we were on the Conan show a few weeks back. Be sure to look for that in the coming weeks on the Team Coco website.
Speaking of websites I need some friends on facebook.
Ok see you laters.

hi!! this is bob's mom

I'm so confused on why my son insists on going by a name that isn't his. oh I'll never understand these kids these days and there desire to be mysterious.

but my 'bob' came home the other day after Seether's week in Canada. he had so much to say. I was happy I couldn't hear most of it because of the fireworks. i'd rather listen to the sound of a thousand screaming bottle rockets than my sons rambling about how they played this festival called Boonstock in Edmonton on Canada Day. I mean come on. it's America day, the Forth of July, I don't need to listen to that fooey.

Boonstock. what a silly name. where is that out in the boonies? I went to Woodstock. although it was in a field there was lots of wood. silly hippies.

he did however tell me that after their show at the commodore ballroom in Vancouver, a stage that used to be built out of tires or something, I dont know what he meant he was rambling, that they went out to some gentlemens club called Brandi's with the singer from nickelback.

now the singer from nickelback looks like a gentleman but I'm still confused on why he thought my son and the band of misfits he works for are. well hopefully at this club they taught those boys some manners.

that chad though seems to be such a great guy, these boys could learn a few things from him. bob talked about how nice he was and that they all hung out at his house after they came from the gentlemans club and had a party at his house and listened to demos from nickelbacks new album.

he also said how well they were taken care of and the food they got to eat and something about a hockey rink in the house. sorry I was looking at the amazing fireworks that just happened. I'm not sure if my son thinks he's Canadian now or what.

he was nice enough to show me this picture of their plane ride back from chads house. By why doesn’t dale give his aviators to the pilot. he laughed when he told me that it only took them two hours to get back to Edmonton when the crew got stuck on an 18 hour bus ride. the last I heard my son was a crew guy and not in the band.

he's such a silly boy but I only here how great and how much the boys in Seether are gentlemen in the making and they have to put up with my mysterious son who has no redeeming qualities.

shut up mom you are embarrassing me.

beauty eh_and the ill tempered moose

Nothing drives an Australian crazier then
by telling them you don’t like AC/DC. But
we are in Canada and man I can’t stand
Rush. But enough about myself, which
oddly enough I’ve been told I don’t talk
about the band that much in these little
words of blah blah blah.
Speaking big egos, I love eggos and am
now extremely hungry, and being hungry
leads to bad decisions. Like this guy. He’s
our merch guy.

He’s a barrel of laughs. Not so much a barrel but more
of a tightly packed summer sausage.
For this trip to the Great White North
the band and crew are all on the same
bus. It’s a good time to spend together
especially when Shaun and Dale are giving
haircuts. Merch just wanted some
lightning bolts on the side of his head like
his hero Vanilla Ice but instead he looks
like the guy from Prodigy.

Shaun looks like Mike Patton and I still
look amazing. Oopsies here I am talking
a-BOOT my self again. See what I did
there? I tried writing with eh Canadian
accent. Beauty eh?

Speaking of all things beauty check out
those tanks.
We, ooppsies, I mean the guys, did a
workplace invasion thing today with the
radio station here in Edmonton, AB. That’s
Canada stupid, not Alabama. The guy who
won was in the Canadian Armed Forces. So
the acoustic set was in between a bunch
of tanks.

Well I hope you, which is probably just
Melissa, enjoyed the new and refreshing
Seether blog-NOW WITH PICTURES.
I’m off to find a Creamy Sleeman. It’s a
beer you perverts.

Seether ding dongs and fruit loops

It’s been a great run with Shaunyding dong, Daley ding dongs and Johnny ding dongs. Last’s night show was a great way to end it! Did you happen to catch the show in Burlington, IA? No? Come on! Well you better have a least shown up somewhere the past 9 weeks.

Speaking of 9 weeks, great movie right? Wait..that’s 9 ½ weeks and it’s terrible. I’m glad I have someone to live with now. One time I came home after 9 weeks I left my self a present in the toilet before I left. It looked like chocolate upside down cake.

We have the day off in Burlington, IA before the show and stayed at the Catfish Bend Casino. (sorry Springfield, MO we will make it up to you somehow) That place had everything! Lazertag, Go Carts, gambling, waterslides. It was a great day to wind down although I think we pretty much wound up the guy who was in charge of the go carts. Ole Bob here had a hell of a time. Always got the slow car and was rammed so many times and so hard that I’d be facing backwards. NO BUMPING!!! A bunch of 30 year olds acting like we were 10. But hey that’s what happens when there is a bar next to the track

So long buds see ya in Edmonton in a week. I have a tough decision to make. There’s a comedy festival here in Chicago this weekend and I can’t make up my mind on who to see tonight. Demetri Martin, Whitney Cummings, or Jim Jefferies.

Bomb threats, bad weather and where is that organ

We’ve had an interesting week since I wrote last. Bomb threat. Check! Lightning storms. Check! Hot swampy sweaty mud butt clubs. Oh you better believe that’s a check. One nasty, nasty check. I actually washed my hair afterwards and scrubbed my lungs.
How do you scrub your lungs you ask? Well it’s like huffing gas and smoking at the same time. Actually it is. Sometimes you just have to get that crap out of your lungs. If gonorrhea had a scent that’s exactly what I was breathing in the whole day.
Speaking of STD’s we are in Grand Rapids today at Fifth Third Ballpark. I never understood the whole Fifth Third thing. Even when I used to pay my mortgage to them. I can tell you what it doesn’t mean and it’s not paying only a fifth of your mortgage on the third of every month.
Speaking of banks I love baseball. And since I haven’t been able to go to a single game yet this season we might as well have a show at one right? And if this whole writing a blog for Seether stops paying the bills I wanna be a mascot that gets heckled and beat over the head. The heckling and the beatings I’m used to. Just last night a took a serious blow to the head. Good times. Or if the whole mascot thing is as dumb as I think it is then I wanna play the organ at the games and heckle the umps like Wilbur Snapp. Better yet I think it’s time for a new Bob Uecker.
Now where’s that number for the neurologist?

Cicadas or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Song that Pays My Salary

So I’ve been slacking on this. Thanks Romero! But you’d think with these past three days off that I’d get it together. NOPE!

Memorial day we had a pretty rad BBQ at Johnny’s house. That was a good time and hilarious. After that we spent the next two days off in Nashville. I’ve never understood the whole Nashvegas thing. I can’t find a casino anywhere. But I’ll tell you what I can find.

Cicadas. Urgh! Those things are the worst. Especially in this heat. Reminds me when I was a kid and I took a whiffle ball bat to lightning bugs. That was a blast. Gooey glowing guts everywhere. But these things kill themselves.

Also spent an amazing time at a gun range out here in Nashville. nRange it’s called. Fired every thing imaginable. Wish Iwould’ve bought that Thumper a few weeks back off that guy in Omaha. I thought that was a made up weapon in Call of Duty. Stupid Cicadas

The best part of Nashville is the Red Door Saloon on Division. Best Chicago bar that isn’t in Chicago. But don’t order the Chi-dog. It’s an insult, delicious, but insulting.

Hell yeah Country Song!!

playing for keeps

Sometimes it’s just not as easy as it seems. Esp today in Washington, DC. There’s nothing like playing a show in the middle of a parking lot when the only bathroom you have is an outhouse, baking in the hot sun, that you have to share with other people that have been eating chili all day.

Glamorous? Nope! Humorous? Depends on how you look at it. Speaking of looking at it – one thing I suggest is not looking at the bottom of the outhouse. It still looks like chili. But if that’s your thing I’m not here to judge- I just don’t think we will have much in common.

So did you guys buy the album on Tuesday? I hope so. I did but on Thursday. Apparently there is no such thing as a record store in Manhattan.

If you’re bored check out this link. I get a great shout out

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GDuAhiNYhtk

Hot Bubbles

Duck stepping it all the way to the bathroom. Man it was one of those mornings for all of us. I don’t know what was in the food at catering in Omaha, but man this morning wasn’t pleasant at all in Milwaukee.

Speaking of Bubbles you ever see Trailer Park Boys? Man those guys are funny. I hear the other two guys own pizza joints in Halifax, Nova Scotia. We are gonna be doing what appears to be a rad show there this summer. That concert will be cool and all but going to J.R. Capone’s is what I’m looking forward to. Unless I’m wrong and they are completely somewhere else. Which the later is probably right.

Anyways we are out of the sweaty rock clubs and into some super cold weather. I’m not sure what happened but I kinda like it. I can wear the same close for more than one day.

Hey the album comes out on Tuesday and if you were one of the great ones that came out to Milwaukee tonight you could actually buy it today. Regarding my last post I naively wanted a gold record. Who am I kidding I want a multi-platinum record!! Speaking of platinum I heard Finding Beauty in Negative Spaces just went platinum. Way to go guys! Keep it up. Daddy’s little buddy likes to be out on tour. 

In the topsy-turvy world of rock having a good solid piece of wood in your hand is often useful

But not in the morning, unless you course you have socks on and you are in your bunk trying not to distract yourself while writing a blog.

Well we’ve just played two of the sweatiest clubs ever. The best part of doing shows like that is the stink that comes with it. Oh and the lack of showers. It’s a glamorous lifestyle I gotta tell ya. I fell like the swamp man super hero. But these past two shows where also recorded live and sold as soon as the band got off stage. Well about 10 mins after they got off stage.

Things that help class up a rather dismal dressing room, like the past two, is this bad ass entertainment system we built for this tour. It’s pretty rad. The recent Mortal Combat took Dale and Shaun about 6 hours a day for a week to beat the last guy. Sorry to all those who waited for them to show up to the meet and greet. Oopsies.

Besides the game playing we got to watch two of the BEST documentaries ever; The Wild and Wonderful Whites of West Virginia and This is Spinal Tap. I can’t wait until the show in Parkersburg, WV. I wanna see them there in the front row. Speaking of Spinal Tap tomorrow is our last day off until Toronto. That’s 2 weeks away. Nothing like the excitement and press around release week! One week away. So you better go buy it. I need another gold record to store in my closet to gather dust. Also we’ll be doing a surprise show in Greenwich Village at the Electric Banana.

Four Easy Payments of $19.95

Hey Buds!

What’s going on? I’m gonna try pumping these out more often then I have been. Before I was paid off in Wampum, which was extremely hard to cash at Chase, now I just don’t get paid. So the pressure is on. But there is always that book deal and you guys to look forward to. Notice how you can comment on the blog posts now? Cool right? Especially when I sign myself up for 42 different accounts so I can troll on it and maybe pick fights with myself.

Enough about Bob for the moment, don’t worry that moment will be brief. Anyways we have been out now for a while now. Flying back and forth from here to there. The guys gotta do a lot of press and stuff before the album comes out. Which is a lot of fun and a lot of time at the airport. My last flight, told you it would be brief, to Nashville made an emergency landing because the lady next to me had a stroke. Don’t worry. She lived.

So we decided to do pre-production in Nashville, we built and designed a whole set. It looks pretty cool. If you haven’t seen the show yet, I gotta ask why haven’t you gone? It’s pretty amazing. Pretty much gutted every Good Will and thrift store in Nashville. But I think we misunderstood the sound guy when he said he wanted to make sure the band sounded huge as a 3 piece. You’ll get that joke if you come to the show. So buy a ticket already. But you better hurry up because they are selling fast.

Seether played their 20^th show last night in Jacksonville, FL for this album that isn’t even out yet. Hopefully we’ll hit over 400 before they stop (HINT HINT… keep booking those shows, like Europe, all of Europe, not just western Europe, Russia would be cool, South America, Australia, New Zealand, Japan, maybe some more USO shows) before they write the next one.

Alright bye-bye Greenville, SC see ya tomorrow Cincinnati.

What ever happened to Bob?

What ever happened to Bob you ask? Well I’ve been super busy sitting on the couch in front of the TV playing Black Ops and taking care of my mail order bride. Both things I’m terrible at but I do destroy at Words with Friends.

I think it’s been over two years since I last made an attempt at humiliating myself and the people that I’m surrounded by everyday. Well anyways we arefinally starting to hit the road after they finished up their studio time. The band is currently in the process of finishing a techno album. Strange I know. Remember that post I did a long time ago where I said the next album should be written by Bob? Well don’t worry if you don’t. No one does. So you guys are gonna get a Seether techno album in the near future. So get your glow sticks and vicks vapor rub ready. It’s not the first(or the last time) that I’ll be ignored. But I’m serious….. I’m listening to it now.

I’d like to try and recap where I left off oh so long ago. Let’s see…. I totally skipped over our tour with Nickelback. Oopsies They were loads of fun.

Then we did a USO tour in Japan. That tour was bananas! Yeah I just said that. So what? Well guess you had to be there. Habu Saki and bananas I’ll never look at the same… or karaoke. Or machine guns or attack dogs. Or the fact that I’m not as tough as I thought I was.

Then we also did 2 mini runs last year in the spring and the fall. Those were fun for the most part. I did miss the smell of morning gas coming from the bunks. Then we went to Guam! I’d love to go there again. By myself.

But now we are here back out for what will be the greatest tour ever. We are currently in Pittsburgh, PA playing a show with a bunch of bands. You may have noticed that Seether is a three piece. Well the hologram machine we had before broke and we didn’t feel like fixing it.